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2017 Pick'em Ranking thru 11 weeks: 

  1. Kropko
  2. boomperOSU
  3. CardaleJonesDiary
Asian Reporter Robert Lee won the week 11 contest.

 

 

 

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Illinois PDF Print E-mail
(1 vote)
Written by Mr Marbles   
Sunday, 12 November 2017

Illinois

Saturday, November 18, 2017
3:30 pm EST
Ohio Stadium, Columbus, OH

COTGS* Index: 70

 *Chances of Things Getting Stupid Index is determined using a highly complicated scientific formula that produces indexed results ranging from 0-100, computed using an array of complex variables and a multitude of over-sized computers located in the basement of Kropkogate.

sylvester.jpg

Illini still bitterly remember The White Man's unthinkable carnage

It's the last home tailgate of the year and Ohio State's most prestigious trophy game; no excuses for not getting to the tailgate early. There will be turkeys frying and the occasional naked man running around screaming incoherently about something he lost--good clean fun for your entire family.

Ohio State enters the game playing for a trip to the Big Ten Championship game and--in case you missed the 128 times it was mentioned during the FOX broadcast last week--a remote chance to back door their way into a playoff spot. Last week, I declared our playoff hopes were dead. For all intents and purposes (or "intensive purposes," for those who prefer commonly used nonsensical phrases), this is still the case.  For now, it doesn't really matter; you should be rooting for chaos at this point regardless of the end-result. Sit back, enjoy the rest of the season, and leave the playoff lobbying to influential members of the press like myself.

The Illini enter the game playing for the chance to wrap up their miserable season as soon as possible, ushering in the timeless Illinois end-of-season tradition where fans log-on to internet message boards and demand the firing of another coach without any idea of a replacement. I will once again lobby that my tax dollars be wasted to bring back Ron Zook with a ten year contract, which contains a buyout clause that will undoubtedly be exercised after two years to fire him again, leaving the school on the hook for another multi-million dollar payout. 

 zookwater.jpg

I've already taken the initiative to prepare marketing pieces, now I'll just sit back and wait for the cease and desist order

It's an annual rite of passage to label Ohio State's second to last regular season contest as a trap game, with pregame broadcasting crews reading recycled cue cards from 1982 asking whether or not ***insert name of current Ohio State head coach*** can keep his team from looking ahead with Michigan looming on the schedule next week. Go ahead and take a drink each time you hear someone utter the phrase "looking ahead" or "trap game" this week and check yourself into a rehabilitation clinic on Sunday. Illinois couldn't trap a Rutger in a grain bin, folks, and they are riding an eight game losing streak despite having a schedule softer than a bag of marshmallows. Unless the ghost of Juice Williams suits up for the Illini, this one should be wrapped up by halftime. Fans will exit Ohio Stadium to a merry chorus of "We don't give a damn for the whole state of Michigan," walk down Woody Hayes Boulevard toward their cars, and pass by an encampment of drunken rebel rousers shouting and singing obscene lyrics about some guy named Chad.   

  

For real-time updates, follow me on The Twitter - @Mr_Marbles

Mr. Marbles wraps up the tailgate season with a trip to Evanston. It's a disheartening feeling to think, after Saturday, it will be another 9 months before I will cone beers in public and urinate into a forested canal bank. The Minnesota Golden Gophers and PJ Fleck's cocaine-induced* personality invade Ryan Field for a very important match-up that will likely have no meaningful consequences other than me tweeting #SalvageTheBoat at Minnesota Football's twitter account again if the Gophers lose. The Wildcats have won five conference games in a row and have clinched second place in the Big Ten West, an accomplishment no one reading this website could possibly care about. It's an 11 am game, which affords the opportunity to make it out of the stadium in time to catch the Ohio State kickoff in the tailgate lot.

*I'm not saying PJ Fleck has a cocaine habit, however, Fleck has yet to publicly deny that he is snorting cocaine out of the inside of Goldy's mascot head 13 times a day.

 

ESPN Pick'em Update

Don't forget to make your Kropkogate ESPN Pick'em selections. Rankings after 11 weeks:

  1. Kropko
  2. boomperosu
  3. CardaleJonesDiary

Asian Reporter Robert Lee won the week 11 contest. 

  

 B1G Expert Pick'em

Each week, Kropkogate's team of expert prognosticators gamble their life savings away while attempting to predict the outcomes of all Big Ten contests. This week's game of intrigue is Rutger vs. Indiana. This game could be better settled by sending each program's highest ranking assistant to the traveling secretary to meet at the halfway point Friday night, where they'd bowl 10 frames at the Alpine Club Lanes in Washington, Pennsylvania to determine the winner.  No one would notice or care that an actual game never took place. I'm excited just thinking about tuning into this on ESPN 2 and hearing Beth Mowins' exuberating voice call an endless series of gutter balls.

 

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marbles.jpg

pizza.jpg

rusw.jpg

tbone.jpg

 

Kropko

   Mr. Marbles

Pizza Hall

 Mr. Winkles 

 T-Bone

Illinois at Ohio State
   Ohio State
   Ohio State  
Minnesota at Northwestern
   Northwestern
   Northwestern  
Rutger at Indiana
   Indiana    Indiana  
Michigan at Wisconsin    Wisconsin    Wisconsin  
Purdue at Iowa
   Iowa    Iowa  
Maryland at Michigan State
   Michigan State
   Michigan State  
Nebraska at Penn State
   Penn State
   Penn State  
           
           
           
           
           
 




           
Last Week
          7-0          6-1         5-2         6-1           5-2
Season Record          72-19          68-23        65-26        71-20          69-22
 
Michigan State PDF Print E-mail
(3 votes)
Written by Mr Marbles   
Friday, 10 November 2017

Michigan State

Saturday, November 11, 2017
12:00 pm EST
Ohio Stadium, Columbus, OH

 

Remember last week when I described the roller coaster of emotions that lie ahead? Saturday at Kinnick was like a roller coaster that sped down the first hill and got stuck upside down for 3 hours on the first loop. Let us never speak of that game again.

Playoff hopes are dead, but a trip to Indianapolis is still within the Buckeyes control, so get on out to Kropkogate and support the team by drinking absurd amounts of alcohol and consuming gallons of cheese-based dips on university property. Rosie, the industrial-sized heat lamp, will be there to keep you warm and burn your gloves when your hands hover too close. Also, it's Michigan State and first place in the division is on the line! While I don't really have ill feeling toward the Michigan State football team, their fans are a different story--which is why I'll just link this detailed narrative explaining why you should hate them too.

 

 

For real-time updates, follow me on The Twitter - @Mr_Marbles

Mr. Marbles is watching the game from the couch this week and will head up to Evanston to tailgate and watch this week's much anticipated primetime game featuring Big Ten powerhouses Purdue and Northwestern. Middle to lower tier bowl positioning/eligibility is on the line and will be fought out UNDER THE LIGHTS in lower 30 degree temperatures. I don't even know why I go to these kinds of games and recognize I should seek counseling for this troubling habit.

 

ESPN Pick'em Update

Don't forget to make your Kropkogate ESPN Pick'em selections .Rankings after 10 weeks:

  1. boomperOSU
  2. anderson9611
  3. Kropko

And just to rub Herky's bird sh*t in the wound, #WadleyHeisman won the week 10 contest. There is no god.

  

 B1G Expert Pick'em

Each week, Kropkogate's team of expert prognosticators gamble their life savings away while attempting to predict the outcomes of all Big Ten contests. Just like the Buckeyes, the expert pickers got roughed up last week and are eager to get back on the right track this Saturday. This week's game of intrigue is Purdue at Northwestern. You are rooting for a 4th straight Wildcat overtime because why the hell not?

 

 krop2.jpg

marbles.jpg

pizza.jpg

rusw.jpg

tbone.jpg

 

Kropko

   Mr. Marbles

Pizza Hall

 Mr. Winkles 

 T-Bone

MSU at Ohio State
 Ohio State Ohio State
 Michigan State   Ohio State
 Ohio State 
Rutger at Penn State
 Penn State Penn State
 Penn State   Penn State
 Penn State
Indiana at Illinois
 Indiana Indiana
 Indiana   Indiana  Illinois 
Nebraska at Minnesota
 Minnesota Minnesota  Nebraska   Nebraska   Nebraska 
Michigan at Maryland
 Michigan Michigan
 Michigan   Michigan   Michigan 
Iowa at Wisonsin  Wisconsin Iowa
 Wisconsin   Wisconsin  Wisconsin 
Purdue at Northwestern  Northwestern Northwestern  Northwestern   Northwestern  Northwestern 
           
           
           
           
           
 




           
This Week
          7-0          6-1         5-2         6-1           5-2
Season Record          72-19          68-23        65-26        71-20          69-22
 
Iowa PDF Print E-mail
(2 votes)
Written by Mr Marbles   
Friday, 03 November 2017

Iowa

Saturday, November 4, 2017
3:30 pm EST
Kinnick Stadium, Iowa City, IA

 Break out the loose meats, Mr. Marbles is heading to Iowa City!

loosemeats.jpg

While loose meat sandwiches are typically associated with Iowa and western areas of Illinois, Mr. Marbles was fortunate to grow up in the isolated loose meat belt of Ohio. In his day, folks back home we're hooked on these things. Nowadays, folks back home are hooked on heroin. 

Last week, we were all in a glass case of emotion.  For over three quarters, we rotated between faint hope and Bobby Knight chair throwin' frustration as the Buckeyes stumbled and fumbled against an incomprehensibly immoral opponent and their penis-looking dirtbag coach. For three and a half quarters, it looked like the program that catered a child rapist's paradise for preying on young boys for decades would not only win, but perhaps blow out the Buckeyes at Ohio Stadium.

And then, a comeback for the ages.

I'm not sure what that even means, but respected journalists have long-used that phrase to introduce stories of memorable sports comebacks and I'm a very respected journalist. In fact, I demand your respect and will direct all those who don't respect my weekly journalistic venture to a web link that will unknowingly redirect you to the religious experience that lies within me@ spin.com. I urge my loyal readers who do show me proper respect to not venture to that site at work as it is still, umm, how do I put this?...active? Anyway, it was certainly a comeback for the ages and Kropkogaters everywhere celebrated and broke out into a 42nd Street Broadway show style song and tap dance until Mr. Roper came up and told everyone to knock it off.

roper.jpg

Stanley Roper was known to respond to a fracas like the one described above with some sort of insulting homosexual comment that would have went over better with audiences in 1979 than today, unless, of course, it was made on ABC's Modern Family, in which case it would be dismissed as good-natured liberal humor rather than protest-worthy reinforcement of stereotypes. The cowardly Mr. Furley would have handled the situation better, but not without calling us all "Tippy Tap Toes" for the rest of our lives. Larry would have come down stairs, embraced the celebration, impregnated all women present, and continued on with his free-swinging bachelor lifestyle as he would have made up a fake name so none of them could track him down. Larry was cool as hell. 

There's no greater feeling than pulling off a nearly impossible comeback, knowing that no matter how bad things got you never stopped pounding Natty Lights and screaming at the college kids playing a game on your television to make it all happen. But the thrill of spectating victory is illusive, as we quickly turn the page and prepare to swill beers, fill crockpots with cheese-based dips, and brace ourselves for the roller-coaster of emotions that lurk ahead the next Saturday.

 

For real-time updates, follow me on The Twitter - @Mr_Marbles

Mr. Marbles and Mr. Winkles will represent the Kropkogate community in Iowa City this week. They are eager to impress the Hawkeye tailgaters with their synchronized coning routine they've been practicing via skype for the past six months. This will be Mr. Marbles' third trip to Kinnick, but first time to see Ohio State. Iowa is 0-2 at Kinnick and 0-? (I don't remember, but probably around 6) at Ohio Stadium when Mr. Marbles is present for their games, which is likely the reason the odds makers are favoring Ohio State by 18.

 

ESPN Pick'em Update

Don't forget to make your Kropkogate ESPN Pick'em selections .Rankings after 9 weeks:

  1. boomperOSU
  2. Kropko
  3. anderson9611

Asian Reporter Robert Lee has won back-to-back weekly contests.

 

 B1G Expert Pick'em

Each week, Kropkogate's team of expert prognosticators gamble their life savings away while attempting to predict the outcomes of all Big Ten contests. We're entering the home stretch and things are getting interesting. Mr. Winkles and Kropko remain tied for first, but T-Bone--once left for dead locked inside the Big Ten surplus stock room--has clawed his way back into the race, fueled by nothing other than a steady diet of expired Rotel and Barbasol.

 

 krop2.jpg

marbles.jpg

pizza.jpg

rusw.jpg

tbone.jpg

 

Kropko

   Mr. Marbles

Pizza Hall

 Mr. Winkles 

 T-Bone

Ohio State at Iowa
 Ohio State Ohio State
 Ohio State  Ohio State
 Ohio State
Wisconsin at Indiana  Wisconsin Indiana
 Wisconsin  Wisconsin  Wisconsin
Illinois at Purdue  Purdue Purdue
 Purdue  Purdue  Purdue
Maryland at Rutger
 Maryland Maryland
 Maryland  Maryland  Maryland
Northwestern at Nebraska
 Northwestern Nebraska  Northwestern  Northwestern  Northwestern
Minnesota at Michigan  Michigan Michigan
 Michigan  Michigan  Michigan
Penn State at Michigan State
 Penn State Penn State
 Penn State  Penn State
 Penn State
           
           
           
           
           
 




           
This Week
          4-3          2-5         4-3         4-3           4-3 
Season Record          65-19          62-22        60-24        65-19          64-20
 
Penn State PDF Print E-mail
(3 votes)
Written by Mr Marbles   
Friday, 27 October 2017

Penn State

Saturday, October 28, 2017
3:30 pm EST
Ohio Stadium, Columbus, OH

satforboysflag.jpg

The Ohio State community welcomes the Penn State Nittany Lions and their supportive fan base to Columbus for an intra-conference football event down by the Olentangy on Saturday. To mark the special occasion, there will be a tailgate hosted upon the grounds of the ag campus near the corner of Woody Hayes and Fyfe.

For those of you who might be unfamiliar, Penn State coined the phrase, "Saturday's are for the boys!" long before Barstool Sports and their "oh so edgy" personalities began branding the phrase on their internet platform. It is worth noting that the Penn State community doesn't interpret this slogan in the same manner as the Barstool ilk. While the team of internet folks shout "Saturday's are for the boys" to conjure the spirit of immature drunken shenanigans, the Penn Staters of the world ran with this slogan and developed a thriving culture of @#$%^&* little boys.

Page two.

And then, when it all was exposed to the public, they stood by Joe Paterno, who knew it was going on the entire time.

"Re-erect the statue!" the sick bastards clamor to this day.

Next, Penn State hired coach James Franklin, the slimy former Vanderbilt coach with a sordid history that any competent institution trying to shed a reputation of a rape culture would have avoided at all costs.  And their fans continue to support this pile of garbage football program.

James Franklin looks like a penis. 

And now you know--the rest of the story.

Good day!

 

For real-time updates, follow me on The Twitter - @Mr_Marbles

Mr. Marbles won't be making the trip to the Columbus for the game as he had promised tailgating hosting duties for a lot of out of towners in town for the Northwestern - Michigan State game in Evanston. MSU at Northwestern has 11 am CT BTN Region Coverage written all over it, but the college football gods, as I've mentioned many times before, are a spiteful bunch, and elected to have it start at the same time as the Ohio State game. So, I'll be broadcasting the game from a parking lot outside of a stadium while a different game takes place inside. It aint easy being Mr. Marbles.

 

ESPN Pick'em Update

Don't forget to make your Kropkogate ESPN Pick'em selections . Ranking thru 8 weeks: 

  1. boomperOSU
  2. CardalJonesDiary
  3. anderson9611

Asian Reporter Robert Lee won the week 8 contest.

 

 B1G Expert Pick'em

Each week, Kropkogate's team of expert prognosticators gamble their life savings away while attempting to predict the outcomes of all Big Ten contests. There's a two-way tie for first as we head into a difficult week of toss-up matchups. Will any of the experts separate from the pack and take a commanding lead? This drama must be just as exciting for the non-panel members reading this on the internet as it is for the participating members.

 

 krop2.jpg

marbles.jpg

pizza.jpg

rusw.jpg

tbone.jpg

 

Kropko

   Mr. Marbles

Pizza Hall

 Mr. Winkles 

 T-Bone

Penn State at Ohio State  Penn State  Penn State
 Ohio State
 Ohio State
 Ohio State 
Rutger at Michigan
 Michigan  Michigan
 Michigan  Michigan  Michigan 
 Wisconsin at Illinois
 Wisconsin  Wisconsin  Wisconsin  Wisconsin  Wisconsin 
Indiana at Maryland  Indiana  Indiana  Indiana  Indiana  Maryland 
Michigan State at Northwestern  Michigan State  Michigan State  Michigan State
 Michigan State  Michigan State 
Minnesota at Iowa
 Iowa  Iowa  Iowa  Iowa  Iowa 
Nebraska at Purdue
 Nebraska  Nebraska  Nebraska  Purdue  Nebraska 
           
           
           
           
           
 




           
Last Week
          5-1          4-2         5-1
        4-2           5-1 
Season Record          57-13          56-14        51-19        57-13          54-16
 
Bye Week PDF Print E-mail
(1 vote)
Written by Mr Marbles   
Monday, 16 October 2017

Ohio State vs Bye Week

After walks in the park against Army, UNLV, Rutger, and Maryland, Ohio State faces their most dangerous competition since the Sooners as they go up against the dreaded bye week. There's nothing more frightening than a college student with free time, so brace yourself for the arrest reports and ensuing supsensions as the weekend progresses.

 No official tailgate for Bye Week, but feel free to show up and drink a few at the usual spot to keep in shape for next week's Penn State tailgate.

 

For real-time updates, follow me on The Twitter - @Mr_Marbles

 Mr Marbles will be back in Evanston launching a tailgate at 7:01 am for the Northwestern - Iowa game. It's a bye week, you aren't doing anything, so why not head on up and cone a beer with him in the golf course lot?

 

ESPN Pick'em Update

Don't forget to make your Kropkogate ESPN Pick'em selections . Ranking thru 7 weeks: 

  1. boomperOSU
  2. anderson9611
  3. #WadleyHeisman

Wadley isn't going to win the Heisman, but #WadleyHeisman enters the Kropkogate Pick'em Championship conversation.  Kropko won the week 7 contest.

 

 B1G Expert Pick'em

Each week, Kropkogate's team of expert prognosticators gamble their life savings away while attempting to predict the outcomes of all Big Ten contests.

 

 krop2.jpg

marbles.jpg

pizza.jpg

rusw.jpg

tbone.jpg

 

Kropko

   Mr. Marbles

Pizza Hall

 Mr. Winkles 

 T-Bone

Iowa at Northwestern  Northwestern Iowa
 Northwestern  Iowa  Iowa
Purdue at Rutger  Purdue Purdue
 Purdue  Purdue  Rutger 
Maryland at Wisconsin
 Wisconsin Wisconsin
 Wisconsin  Wisconsin  Wisconsin 
Indiana at Michigan State
 Michigan State Michigan State
 Michigan State
 Michigan State
 Michigan State 
Illinois at Minnesota
 Minnesota Minnesota  Minnesota  Minnesota  Minnesota 
Michigan at Penn State  Penn State Penn State
 Penn State
 Penn State
 Penn State 
           
           
           
           
           
           
 




           
This Week
          5-1          4-2         5-1
        4-2           5-1 
Season Record          57-13          56-14        51-19        57-13          54-16
 
Week 7 Update PDF Print E-mail
(1 vote)
Written by Mr Marbles   
Wednesday, 11 October 2017

Ohio State at Nebraska

Saturday, October 14, 2017
7:30 pm EST
Memorial Stadium, Lincoln, NE

Mr. Marbles will be in Lincoln for the game this weekend, providing live updates throughout the day. Message him on ICQ if your going to be there and would like to partake in pregame activities.

For real-time updates, follow me on The Twitter - @Mr_Marbles

Twitter's #1 source for Baby Jessica McClure conspiracy theories (hint: she's still living in that well despite what the #fakenews media might have told you).

 

ESPN Pick'em Update

Don't forget to make your Kropkogate ESPN Pick'em selections . Ranking thru 6 weeks: 

  1. boomperOSU
  2. anderson9611
  3. CardaleJonesDiary

Kropko won the week 6 contest.

 

 B1G Expert Pick'em

Each week, Kropkogate's team of expert prognosticators gamble their life savings away while attempting to predict the outcomes of all Big Ten contests. Mr. Winkles has tried to warn us about our ways, but we don't hear him talk. Is it his fault when we've gone too far, and we got too far, cause on him we walk? Mr. Winkles: a man, a human in flesh, but not by law. I feed you dignity to stand with pride, realize that all in all you stand tall (in first place in the Big Ten Expert Pick'em).

 

 krop2.jpg

marbles.jpg

pizza.jpg

rusw.jpg

tbone.jpg

 

Kropko

   Mr. Marbles

Pizza Hall

 Mr. Winkles 

 T-Bone

Ohio State at Nebraska
 Ohio State Ohio State
 Ohio State  Ohio State  Ohio State
Michigan at Indiana
 Michigan Michigan
 Indiana  Michigan  Michigan
Rutger at Illinois
 Rutger Illinois
 Illinois  Rutger  Rutger
Purdue at Wisconsin  Wisconsin Wisconsin
 Wisconsin  Wisconsin  Wisconsin
Northwestern at Maryland
 Maryland Northwestern
 Northwestern  Northwestern  Northwestern
Michigan State at Minnesota
 Michigan State Michigan State
 Minnesota  Minnesota  Minnesota
           
           
           
           
           
           
 




           
This Week
          5-1          5-1         3-3
        5-1           5-1 
Season Record          52-12          52-12        46-18        53-11          49-15
 
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